In light of the busyness, and the frustration that comes with it, I have found myself praying urgently for two things lately: the financial support needed to be able to do ministry full time and for God to bring my future husband quick (a balanced help mate!).
I forced myself to take a break right before dinner today and spend some time in the Word. The psalmist cried for God to revive him and for God to show him the depths of His unfailing love. I found myself praying that too, and praying urgently for the things above...all the while surrendering my will to His. It's an interesting state to be in. You want something so bad that you have no control over. All you can do is pray. Yet, not matter how hard and urgently you pray, it doesn't change the Father's will, and you know that. You can kneel and cry and try and "earn" some quickened response, but His perfect timing will prevail.
As I rose from prayer to get ready to leave for the evening, a familiar loved song came on as I was listening to my ipod. I found it easy to sing along with the girl as she said,
"What can I do for You, what can I bring to You, what kind of song would like me to sing. Cause I'll dance a dance for You, pour out my love for You, what can I do for You beautiful King...."
Oh what can I do Lord? I prayed. What can I do to bring these things to pass? What can I do to grow deeper in you so that I'm so fully satisfied that I can do without these things? Why is this process is taking so long...
That's when the song progressed and the Lord's response to her broke through...
"And then I hear you sing to me...
You don't have to do a thing.
Just simple be with me,
and let those things go, cause they can wait another minute.
this moment is to sweet.
Would you please stay here with me
and love on me a little longer,
Cause I'd like to be with you a little longer,
cause I'm in love with you...
It hit me like a ton of bricks.."let those things go, cause they can wait another minute."
The work can wait. The future can wait. My desires, and dream, and longings can wait.
There will be plenty of time for all those things but I can hear the Lord asking me through this song, "Would you please stay with me and love on me a little longer? Would you take the opportunity now to learn from simply being in my presence? Would you love on me and sit in intimacy with me before things do change and people and things fight even more for your attention?
I don't know about you, but the word "wait" probably brings a twitch of fear and frustration and maybe even pain at it's sound. But what if we started hearing these words in it's place? What it "wait" was code for the Lord saying to your heart...
Slow down your busy mind, and your busy world and just be with me...
You got to learn to just rest, just realize
Hear me say you don't have to do a thing
just simply be with me
and let it all go...
cause it doesn't even really matter.
Just wait cause this moment is to sweet,
would you please stay here with me
and love on my a little longer...
cause I love to be with you a little longer...
cause I'm in love with you.
I'm IN LOVE with you.
I'm praying that the Lord will help me heed that, no matter how long the to-do list, how frustrating the day, or how anxious I am to move forward into full time ministry at the USCWM (or even in finding my future husband, if the Lord wills!). And I'm praying that for you too, because there have been fractions of times when I did get it, when I did just simply be with Him...and those moments are indeed too sweet to waste.
*Song: "A Little Longer (live) by Brian and Jenn Johnson